i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
I need mimosas to revive my soul
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
