i need an iv and a liver transplant
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
