i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
