I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Say something about gay babies.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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