I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
He called his prostate his "boner button".
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
