i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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