I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize
