Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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