your parents love me but you hate me
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
