Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
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