why im i the only drunk person in the library?
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
