Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
