True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
operation harelip BJ is a go
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
