I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Randomize