She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Randomize
