I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
