I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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