Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
