come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
