Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
