someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Randomize