you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
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