she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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