i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
