# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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