I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
