yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
