she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
