Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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