Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
The adults are the big ones right?
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
