Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize
