I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Randomize
