Barsexuality is the new black.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
