do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
