You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
