Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
