So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
i now understand why vodka
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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