But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Randomize