After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
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