dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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