The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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