You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
3pm strippers are depressing
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
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