I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
