The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
