Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Randomize
