I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
