Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
God, I missed his penis.
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