Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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