i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
NoShamevember. You game?
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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