Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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